"Disclaimer" This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to actual persons living is just a coincidence.
This is Dirk Pitt with the awaited interview from the Vile Three. Interview is in order from Pepe, Voratious, and then PukkoSmellofDeath. Thank you to the three of you for this interview.
Dirk: Now Pepe, why should Decatur fear the Vile Three in particular yourself? I can see the other two here but you look to be 200 years old. Why fear you?
Pepe: Well, I may be old but I can kill with my Cantankerousness. If you start resisting it I will send Pepeochio after you.
Dirk: Well Pepe, nothing personal but why should I fear a wooden mule?
Pepe: Well Dirk, He has always wanted to be a real mule and in order to do that he better listen to me. I will have him bite anyone I want and give them splinters that will become infected with this plague going on. Especially the famine and PESTILENCE here. You won't get away from PESTILENCE.
Dirk: I see. Thank you for your comments Pepe.
Dirk: Now Voratious, you seem to be a little big around the waist if not all over. Aren't you kind of slow to really threaten anyone? I think a baby can crawl faster than you.
Voratious: That may be true Dirk, BUT, only after I have gorded myself after 23 hours of eating. If I am hungry and my hands are empty then look out. Why do you think there are no more strays roaming around?
Dirk: HMMMMM, I was wondering where the animal population was. I thought maybe everyone finally listened to Bob Barker in the late 20th century/early 21st century in getting their pets spayed or neutered. I guess you have been around for awhile.
Voratious: Yes, for many many years. I just stayed in hiding until the right time to come out of the closet I was hiding in.
Dirk: Yes, thank you once again for this interview.
Dirk: Now for the biggest danger of all, PukkoSmellofDeath. Well Pukko, word on the street is you are the one to fear the most, please elaborate for the viewers.
Pukko: YES I AM!!!!!! I may not look much but my FLATULENCE can overcome anyone, including Pepe's Cantankerousness or Voratious's appetite.
Dirk: Yes, I can see that. THat is why I am wearing one of these TripsT biosuits. May not have a mesh interwoven through it but I think it should be good for this interview only with the three of you. I know it will not hold up long against your flatulence. OUCH!!!!!!! Something bit me.
Pukko: Yes, I figure you may have 15 or 20 minutes safe time there. My flatulence cloud covers an extreme area. Nobody can get close enough to me before the suit disintegrates.
Dirk: I see. That most likely explains the 5 mile wide green gaseous cloud I saw when you three were coming into town. Also explains why alot of vermin are laying dead in the roadway. OUCH!!!!!!!!!!!! Now cannn you xplain why you are here and whatttt youuuu want?
Pukko: Yes, I stayed in the shadows until I made sure I was better than anyone. Now that I am, I will hold this city hostage to all my demands. If I don't get what I want I will hospitalize everyone if I am nice, if not I will kill everyone in this town. My way or the highway.
Dirk: THankkk you Pukko and I wantttt to OUCH!!!!! thank alllll three of you overalllllll.
Seems like this may be my last broadcast from the field. OUCH!!!!!!!!! Seems like this suit wasn't as protective as I thought.
This is Dirk Pitt reporting frommmm the site of the Vile Threeeeee. Now back to your regular AWL newsssssss. Good nighttttt anddddd good byeeee. |